10. Did you get any under the tree?
9.  I think your balls are hanging too low.
8.  Check out Rudolph's Honkers!
7.  Santa's sack is really bulging.
6.  Lift up the skirt so I can get a clean breath.
5.  Did you get a piece of the fruitcake?
4.  I love licking the end till it's really sharp and pointy.
3.  From here you can't tell if they're artificial or real
2.  Can I interest you in some dark meat.
1.  To get it to stand up straight, try popping it against the wall.