10. Did you get any under the tree?
9. I think your balls are hanging too low.
8. Check out Rudolph's Honkers!
7. Santa's sack is really bulging.
6. Lift up the skirt so I can get a clean breath.
5. Did you get a piece of the fruitcake?
4. I love licking the end till it's really sharp and pointy.
3. From here you can't tell if they're artificial or real
2. Can I interest you in some dark meat.
1. To get it to stand up straight, try popping it against the wall.