You sing along with the elevator music.
You would rather go to work than stay home sick.
You enjoy hearing about other people's operations.
You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
People call at 9.00 p.m. and ask, "Did I wake you?"
You answer a question with, "Because I said so."
The end of your tie doesn't come anywhere near the top of your pants.
You take a metal detector to the beach.
You know what the word equity means.
You can't remember the last time you laid on the floor to watch television.
You're asleep, but others worry that you're dead.
Your back goes out more than you do.
You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.
You buy a compass for the dash of your car or truck.
You are proud of your lawn mower.
You best friend is dating someone half his age, and isn't breaking any laws.
Your ears are hairier than your head.
You talk about "good grass" and you're referring to someone's lawn.
You get into a heated argument about pension plans.
You can go bowling without drinking.
You have a party and the neighbours don't even realize it.
People send you this list.
